Daddy Issues Memoirs, Chapter One: Taking Turns

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Looking back at my early sex life, it has been quite a journey. I decided to write down my memoirs, starting with the event that set me on the path of my discovery. It all began during the summer where I spied on my backdoor neighbor. He was old and fat, yet I couldn’t help craving for him. This first chapter tells the story of my initial sexual suppression and how I gave into my forbidden desires for the first time.

Joy and laughter resounded on the other side of the fence. Almost out drowning the music playing in the background. I heard people talking but I didn’t care to listen what they were saying.

As I sat on the porch I gazed at the trees at the end of the yard. The sunlight warmed my skin, but my heart felt empty. Unlike my loud next door neighbors, I was caught up in my own little world.

I didn’t feel like socializing much these days. It seemed as if life was nothing more than keeping up appearances. In order to belong and be accepted by the herd. Sure, I’d tried it. Hanging with the cool crowd after school, breaking the rules by acting up in class, smoking pot behind the sheds… But it just wasn’t that exciting. At least, not until I discovered a whole new way to “blow the joint”.

His name was Jason. The handsome jock like you know him from the movies. He was the it-guy whose name escaped every girl’s mouth at least a few times a day. The only thing that escaped Jason’s mouth however was my dick.

It all started on a drunken school night. The gang roamed the streets while getting two on with booze and weed, when one of the guys thought he was being funny by throwing a rock through a showcase. I always thought of that one as a complete and utter fool. At that moment he sure didn’t prove me wrong. He annoyed me so much that I wished to punch him in the face. But there was no time for that.

As soon as the alarm went off everybody fled into a different direction. As you can guess, me and Jason ended up in the same alley. After we sat quietly for a while, he decided to take a piss. When he caught my eyes staring at his cock it didn’t take him long to get on to me.

“Care for a taste?” he said. Where after he forced my mouth onto his rod.

I took mine out too and before I knew it we were taking turns. The alcohol was flowing through our hard teenage bodies while we sucked each other dry.

After that night this kind of get together had become a regular. But unfortunately, at the end of last year Jason had finished high school and now he went off to college. He was my senior by three years, and so my detention days weren’t over just yet.

Our last meeting had been awkward, as if we both already knew this meant goodbye. But that’s just the way things go. Out of sight out of mind – or at least that was what I tried to tell myself. He had been an exciting distraction. But now I was back to where I started. In touch with the inner feeling of discontent with who I was and nothing or no one to take my mind of it.

That day my mom was working an extra shift at the hospital. So at least I could find some privacy other than in my own room. When my eyes fell on the tennis ball in front of me, I picked myself up off the porch. After I grabbed the ball, I started bouncing it around on the tiles across the yard. I made it go up and down, over and over again, without thinking or without a purpose. Just as one of the days in my life.

Get up, get breakfast, go to school, go home, surf the internet instead of doing homework, and waste away in my own misery of self-hate and self-pity. Until everything ends at night; only to start all over again the next day.

But then the little ball took a turn. Inattentively I threw it too hard, and it flew over the fence and into the backyard of my rear neighbor. Don’t ask me why I even bothered, but within a few seconds I clambered over the medium high fence.

On the other end I landed on some thick shrubs. I peeked through the trees in front of me and there it was. In the center of a well-groomed garden lied the yellow ball. But before I took a step forward, the backdoor slid open and a stocky appearance set foot into the garden.

Ronald was a grumpy old man who must have been in his fifties by then. He had been living behind us for as long as I could remember. When passing him down the street he never said a word to me. I figured he wasn’t very fond of other people. But whenever I saw him, something fascinated me about him. When I was little, I imagined what it would be like to lay on his big belly. Maybe because I was inspired by The Jungle Book – or maybe because he was my imagination of what a daddy looked like. His tall and firm posture must have been quite impressive to me as a kid. Even though I also stood quite tall now at the age of fifteen, he still looked imposing.

He walked into the garden with nothing more than his shorts on. Immediately my eyes were drawn to the enormous bulge, dangling under the shed of his big hairy belly. My cock got an instant reaction, and I felt my glans pressing against the inside of my jeans.

What the hell is wrong with me?! I thought to myself. How could I get turned on by this dirty old man? He was old enough to be my father, balding and overweight. But still, the sight of his naked body made me feel all warm inside.

When he spotted the little ball, he made a deep bend and picked it up. His big hairy forearm was attached to a massive hand, in which the round shape he held looked even smaller. For a moment he sniffed at it while wobbling his moustache. It looked like a thick grey broom, making his upper lip disappear.

Crack! I heard from under my feet, as I accidentally stepped on a branch. Instantly I dove down behind the bushes.

Ronald looked up and vividly glanced through the garden. Where after he lay down the ball and walked up to a garden hose. The splashing sound of water filled the yard while he took care of his plants. Meanwhile I still couldn’t keep my eyes off him.

Attentively I observed the middle-aged man in front of me, as my breath got heavier. The rim of remaining grey hair around his scalp, the scratchy hairs of his thick moustache, the broad chest covered with fur, his firm legs and calves, his burly feet, his thick fingers… My heart raced as I slowly opened my zipper. A part of me said no. But the other part just wanted to cum! So there I found myself creeping at the old bear man while rubbing my shaft.

Just like in my early fantasies I imagined myself laying on his hairy belly. This time we were both naked, while I rested my erect member on his endowed meat rod. I placed my hands on his fur coated thorax where upon my fingers began molding his beefy pecks. Almost as if they lead a life of their own. He pinched his thick fingers into my buttocks as his piercing grey eyes captured my soul. With a firm grip he turned my body around and lay me down on my back. After that he lay his full body weight on top of me and kissed me in my neck. My toes curled as I felt the bristly moustache hairs tickling my skin. He went down to my nipples, followed by my navel, and then… finally reached my cock. He took it into one of his massive shovel hands and started to jerk me off.

In an instant my prostate released a big load of cum which flew out of my penis and into the trees.

“Aaaaawh!” I sighed, while convulsively trying to keep my voice down.

Hastily I retreated further back into the bushes. Afraid that the old bear would catch on to me after all. I was relieved to see he still wasn’t aware of the young teenage boy who just got off on him. All I had to do now was wait until he left the garden. Which approximately turned out to be within ten minutes. Then finally I left the mature man’s property… without a small yellow ball.


Back home I jumped into the shower and washed every inch of my body. I felt so dirty. What had gotten into me?! Spying on a grumpy old fart while touching myself. Even to the point of getting off! I truly had some serious issues. Daddy issues that is. I decided to act as if this had never happened. It shouldn’t have! Feeling sexually attracted to men was one thing, but what happened that afternoon was an entirely new kind of low. I had been with the most beautiful guy in school for Christ’s sake. Not to mention the fact that my own looks were fit for a Calvin Klein ad as well. I was far out of that ugly geezer’s league!


I stepped out of the shower and cleared my head of impure thoughts. As I dried off my athletic body, I slowly became at ease again. After I put on a clean set of clothes, I walked down the stairs and headed to the kitchen. The impressions of that afternoon had stoked my appetite. Hastily I put some berries in a blender with milk and whey powder, after which I poured the fruity drink in a glass.

“Hmmm,” I sighed. I really needed that.

I went back to the living room and sat down on the couch. I closed my eyes for a moment to enjoy the piece. When after a few minutes I was startled by the sound of a ringing doorbell.

Ding Dong!

I figured it was probably another Jehovah’s witness, in search of a sinful soul that had yet to be saved. After all it was a Saturday. Sluggishly I got up from the sofa. It was time to make clear I didn’t want to be saved. Again!

So I abruptly pulled open the front door in an irritated manner.

But when I saw the broad man standing in the doorway, the arrogant look on my face was swiftly replaced by pure modesty.

“C-can I help you?” I stuttered.

He leaned one of his large hands on the doorpost while he let the other one rest on his hip. Now fully clothed, his beer belly bulged over his pants. While a few of his chest hairs were still revealed by his partially opened shirt. Behind a black leather belt, the brown fabric was stuffed into his pants. As he narrowed his eyes, he viciously examined me from the bottom up. The frown on his face emphasized the folds in his forehead, while his bushy eyebrows made him look even more stern. He wasn’t what one would call handsome. Not at all. But still his face fascinated me. From the subtle lines around his eyes to the loose skin of his extra chin. But most of all, the intimidating yet charismatic grey eyes.

“As a matter of fact, you can…’’ he said in a low voice. ‘‘And you will!”

He stepped into the hallway as he pushed the door aside. After which he composedly closed it behind him. Thereupon he slowly approached me in a threatening manner and grabbed me by my throat.

Immediately I felt taken over by shame when I realized where this was going.

“Has no one ever told you that it is rude to spy on someone?” he said while he clenched his teeth.

I felt like I was going to die of embarrassment. Since I couldn’t even take a look at myself in the mirror for what I’d done, I definitely couldn’t handle being confronted about it. My vision got blurry as I felt my eyes welled with tears. This would be the beginning of an even greater humiliation. He would let everybody know about my act of perversion. How I trespassed on his private property in order to satisfy my sexual needs. Masturbating at the sight of an old naked man. Not only would I have to face my own sick mind, I also would have to face being judged for it. What was I going to do? There was no way out. I had to beg him. Beg him that he kept quiet about it.

“Speak up!” he said, where after he released my neck and gave me a forceful slap in the face.

“I-I’m s-sorry,” I cried. “Please don’t tell anyone!”

Like a little boy I wept while keeping my head down. It was too hard to look him straight in the eyes. Never in my life had I felt so ashamed. When all of the sudden I felt a warm hand grabbing my chin. With his big thumb Ronald gently dried away one of my tears. Stunned by his act of kindness I cautiously raised my head and looked into his eyes. His previous fierce look had made way for a roguish twinkling in his eyes. Giving me a relieved yet suspicious feeling.

“No need for tears boy,” he said. “You’ve been a very naughty boy, but I’ll forgive you.”

His comforting words put me at ease, while the rate of my pounding heart slowly decreased.

“However,” he continued, “I do have to punish you.”

Instantly my heartbeat increased again. He grinned when he saw the disturbed look on my face. He came up to me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. After which he slowly led me into the living room under his firm grip. I followed his instructions and walked along with him until he stopped me at the couch. He placed his hands on my hips while he attentively examined my upper body.

“I have to admit I didn’t mind your perverted ways all that much,” he said. “My oh my, what a beautiful boy you are.”

When he stroked my face with the palm of his hand, I pulled away my head and tried to step away. But he wouldn’t let me and grabbed me by my wrists.

“Let go of me!” I yelled.

“Now now boy, don’t act like you didn’t want this,” he grinned. “I saw the way you were rubbing your pecker behind my bushes. You wanted to see one on an old guy, am I right?”

He opened his belt. “I will show you!”

He unzipped his pants and brought out a mighty schlong. The big dick of which I had only witnessed an outlining in cotton before, was now on full display right in front of me. There was no doubt about it that Ronald was an endowed man with a perfectly shaped cock.

“Go ahead, touch it,” he said.

Hesitant I kept staring at the uncut piece of meat, which came with a set of big hairy balls. But when I still hadn’t moved after three seconds, Ronald grabbed my wrist and brought my hand to his dick. So I did as he said and wrapped my fingers around it.

His member felt warm, and it was almost as if I could feel the blood pumping through its veins. The longer I held it the harder it got – or better said, the harder we both got. Cause it didn’t take long for my body to respond to the feeling of a rising boner in my hand.

As I watched the impressive penis grow to its full extent, I felt a burning desire to take it into my mouth. Just for a split second. To taste the tip of the huge pink glans.

But before I got the chance to do anything stupid, Ronald turned away and sat down on the couch.

“I showed you mine,” he said, while he fumbled his still erect pecker back into his pants. “Now you show me yours.”

At first, I didn’t know how to respond. This already had escalated enough. Obviously, this man wanted to manipulate me. But I decided then and there that I wasn’t going to let him. So what if I’d had a little fantasy about him. I wasn’t going to act on it. I was a handsome young boy, and handsome young boys didn’t get with ugly old men. So it was time to show this ugly old man the door.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I said resolute.

For a moment he seemed stunned by my determination. But he quickly retrieved his confidence and the roguish expression on his face.

“Well, maybe you’re right,” he said. “Maybe it’s best if I just tell your mom how her son is spying on the neighbors. Preferingly with his prick hanging out of his pants.

“Actually, I think it would be best if the whole neighborhood was aware of the fact that there lives a pervert among them”. He gave me a nasty grin. “Don’t you agree?”

Defeatedly, I looked down at the floor. He had me right where he wanted me. I decided to give in and prudently began to undo myself of my clothes. Even though I felt disgusted, I still was hard as a rock. Which was now clearly visible to him.

“That erection doesn’t lie son,” he said as he attentively observed my body. “Why don’t you come over here and let daddy take a closer look.”

I no longer objected and went along with his request. When he wrapped his thick fingers around my dick, my body trembled. I told myself it was of aversion, but deep down I already knew it was of pleasure. After that, he let both his hands run over my skin as he looked up towards my teenage body, standing in front of him before the sofa. I still wasn’t ready to admit it to myself, but I loved to be touched by him. When he grabbed my hips and made me turn around, I got nervous though. It was not long after that when I felt the tickling of a scratchy moustache between my buttocks.

He took a deep inhale. “Aaaaah,” he sighed. Enjoying the smell of my wet anus. “Now bend over daddy’s knee. It’s time to start your punishment.”

Cautiously I lay down with my belly on his broad legs and put my rear up in the air. Staring at the beige carpet covering the living room, while waiting for the first hit of his flat hand on my skin. Since I never had a daddy, I also never got punished by one before.


Ronald kept a firm hand. With great force he spanked my bare ass while I pressed my fingers in the palms of my hands.


Another one – and after that a couple more.

He was relentless and kept hitting me until my butt was sore.

When he finally stopped, he spread my cheeks wide open. For a moment I wasn’t sure what he was going to do, but then I felt a wet string drip onto my hole. He gently smeared his saliva over it with his index finger, while my sphincter cramped by his touch. It was not yet ready to be entered. Ronald on the other hand was very ready and pushed his finger in. I was startled and immediately tried to get up, but he forcefully pushed me down with his other hand. Sending out a clear message that he was in charge. Where after he added another finger and actively began to finger my hole. Deeper and deeper until he reached my prostate.

I felt violated and ashamed but at the same time he completely aroused me. So I closed my eyes and just let it come over me. Secretly enjoying it more with every second.

When he took his fingers out of me, I could hear by the sniffing sound of his nose, how he enjoyed my scent once more.

“Because you have been so cooperative during your punishment, I will give you a little treat.”

After I got back on my feet, Ronald took off his belt and dropped his pants to his ankles. Revealing a rock-hard erection for the second time around. But this time he would expect me to do more than just take it into my hand. I knew then and there that I would have to blow him off in order to keep my secret. With the amount of dignity I had just lost, it wouldn’t make much difference anyway.

“If I do this, will you promise you won’t tell anyone?”

There was that twinkling in his eyes again. “I tell you what… If you satisfy me, then I will promise you that I will never tell a single soul about your… little ‘adventure’ in my garden.

“Now get on your knees and show daddy what you can do with those lips.”

As I kneeled before him, I hesitated one last time. He was covered with hair from his bulgy calves to his hanging balls. Now I came closer I could smell the manly odor coming from his crotch. It could’ve repulsed me but instead it made me crave for his cock even more. So I stopped thinking, pulled back the foreskin, and just brought my mouth to his glans.

When I felt the thick head on my tongue, all the tension in my body got released. It tasted so good that I put my lips around it as tensely as I could. Sucking it like it was the most delicious popsicle ever made. I licked his shaft from top to bottom, after which I continued with his balls. Taking them into my mouth one at a time. I was so horny that I didn’t even mind a few hairs sticking to my tongue. It all just felt too damn good.

“Hmmmmm,” I moaned with my mouth full.

Ronald groaned deeply. “Good boy, oooooh, keep going!”

He grabbed the back of my head and pushed me further onto his dick. Forcing me to take the rod up to the back of my throat. He gave me a short break when I had to gag, where after he shoved his meat right back in again. I kept sucking and sucking until I almost felt like begging him for his load.

But then he grabbed me by my hair and pulled me off his cock.

“You’re good at that but I’m curious to know which other talents you possess. Why don’t you come closer and take a seat on daddy’s big dick?”

Within an instant I got back to my senses. Staggered by his words and realizing his deception. He had been plotting towards this all along. From the pressuring me to reveal my body to the blackmailing me to give him a blowjob. Letting me believe that would be the last thing to fulfill my end of the bargain. But it wasn’t.

He wanted it all!

“You said you would keep my secret if I gave you a blowjob!”

“I said, I would keep your secret if you satisfied me.” He stroked his dick. “But as you can see, I’m still hard.”

“I will suck you as long as you need me to make you cum!” I hopelessly tried to convince him.

“As nice as that sounds, in order to get off, I need something a little more… tighter.”

I never had been fucked before in my life. The one time me and Jason went anal, I was the one giving it to him. But besides that, I had no experience in that department. Although I might have been wanting to try it sometime, I certainly did not want this fat man to be my first. That way he would take the last small part of the dignity I had left.

But then again, the alternative seemed even worse. My life would never be the same if people knew what happened that day. At least my sins would remain a secret if I just gave him what he wanted… just this once.

What happened next felt almost unreal to me. It was as if my body was controlled by someone other than myself. Without much hesitation I clambered onto his lap, and I just grabbed it. I grabbed the big dick and put it against my hole… whereupon I cautiously pushed it in.

I could feel my face twitch while I tried to slid Ronald’s huge cock further inside me. Inch by inch. My tight sphincter tensely encircled his firm rod, which slowly disappeared into my anus. When I felt like I couldn’t go any further, I finally stopped going down.

But apparently Ronald still had a few inches left for me. He forcefully grabbed onto my shoulders and rammed himself fully into my body.

“Aaaaah!” I screamed out.

“No leftovers boy,” he grinned. “You’re going to get every inch!”

He then grabbed my hips and began pushing me up and down his rock-hard penis. The blood-filled pecker was now digging its way into my wet teenage hole. Which was burning from the unknown friction of an oversized cock. I was relieved that even though he had entered me brutally, he continued in a sustained pace. I felt like I could breathe again and give my ass a chance to adjust to the situation.

As I felt his penis rubbing me from deep inside, over and over again, my body slowly became free of all tension. The previous pain now made way for a strange sensation. A feeling I had never felt before. But it was not bad, on the contrary – and I was starting to enjoy it. Instead of passively sitting on his dick while he was doing all the work, I now began to actively shove my hole onto it. My heart raged as I willingly took his cock inside me, again and again.

“Oooh oooh oooh,” I sighed as I couldn’t help but moaning of pleasure.

“You like getting fucked?!” Ronald growled while he began to take me harder. “Huh?!”

I refused to respond and kept my lips sealed.

“Answer me!” he shouted while he began fucking me even harder.

The feeling was so good, but I couldn’t bring myself to say a word. “Oooooh,” was all I could bring out.


He slept me in the face but still I didn’t say anything.

Then he grabbed my throat while he rammed his dick even faster up in my ass. He was now fucking me in full force.

“Aaaaah,” I screamed! The sensation became so strong I almost couldn’t take it anymore. When all of the sudden… he stopped.

“Get off!”

Bewildered I looked at him. “Wh-what do you mean?” I stuttered.

The roguish gaze in his eyes had returned. “Since you don’t seem to be able to affirm you like what I’m doing to you, I’m letting you off the hook.” He then pushed me off his lap and got off the couch.

Flabbergasted I watched how he raised up his pants again and put on his belt.

“Y-you might as well finish the job,” I said with a chunk in my throat. “After all, a deal is a deal.” Not able to admit I wanted him to fuck me until he would make me cum.

He turned himself towards me and smirked. “You seem to have an awful lot of norms and values all of a sudden – I can’t remember you having those when you were hiding behind those bushes this afternoon. Why don’t you just confess you liked me inside of you?”

I turned my face to the ground while I wrapped my arms around my bare body. My eyes filled themselves with tears.

“Confess,” he said.

Deeply ashamed I was to come to the realization he was right. I had loved every moment of it. The touch of his hands, the taste of his dick, the poking feeling when he fucked me. He had given me a sensation I had never experienced with Jason. The ugly truth was that I loved having sex with this old man even more.


Deeply disturbed were my urges, and that awareness actually made me feel free. Free to admit, free to “confess” I wanted nothing more than being screwed until I achieved the total satisfaction I had been longing for all along.

“Yes,’’ I said.

“Yes?” – Yes what?” he urged.

“Yes, I confess.”

“And to what do you confess my son?”

“To wanting your dick!”

It felt good to say the words.

“I want it so bad,” I said, “I can feel it burn – burn in my skin.”

I looked into his eyes. The roguish grey eyes, in which the satisfaction of his conquest glistened.

“Yes, I want your cock! – Please daddy, fuck me – Please!”

“Don’t you worry boy,” he said while taking off his belt again. “I’m gonna fuck you.”

This time he took off all his clothes. Revealing his beautiful hairy bear body. His fully erect cock pointing proudly towards me.

I jumped off the couch and put my lips around his pink glans once more.

“Hmmm,” I moaned. Finally feeling free to fully enjoy it.

I sucked his dick for a while, whereupon I lay down on my back.

Eagerly I put my legs up in the air, spreading my craving hole. Ready to receive – ready to be taken by the big brute with his mighty dick.

Ronald put the big veiny cock inside me… Again.

“Oooh – Yes daddy, don’t hold back!”

He didn’t. He raged his hung horse deeper inside me than I could have ever wished for. I closed my eyes and enjoyed every inch. I felt the heavy weight of the big stocky man pressing me into the rugged floor. Pushing his endowed member in and out of my body, over and over, while I squeezed my sphincter tightly around it. Molding it with my hole as firmly as I could. Determined to not let him out of me until I got his load. Spreading my legs even wider in order to be ready to achieve an outburst of seamen. I wanted to be filled up so full that my hole would spill over with his white substance.

“Fuck me daddy, fuck me daddy – Yesss, fuuuck meee!” I screamed.

“Oooh yes! – Oooh yes! – YES!” Ronald responded in his deep voice.

He wrapped his massive hands around me while he kept banging my ass. Harder and harder until my prostate almost exploded. He looked into my eyes and then pushed his lips on mine. Passionately he kissed me. His bristly upper lip tickling my face. His firm chest warming my body. His strong fingers stroking my skin. Continuously the old man on top of me kept banging his hips onto my teenage body. Digging his enormous prick deeper inside my tight little hole, while I wrapped my legs around his big waist. The sensation of my prostate became heavier and heavier, and I felt I would last not much longer.

“Shoot your load daddy! – Shoot!” I begged.

“Yes baby I’m getting close – Yes! – Yes! – Aaaaah!” he growled as he unleashed an amazing amount of sperm deep inside my hole.

I could feel the warm fluid gush through my body, whereupon not long after that, I unleased an outburst of cum as well.

“Oooooh!” – At last.

Ronald’s dick poked me a few last times before it went out.

Without any words he got up and put on his clothes. Thereafter he left the room and saw himself out. I heard the front door closing while I stared towards the ceiling. Covered in my own cum, while his seeped out of my ass – leaving a sticky paste on the rug beneath me.

In that moment I realized my life had taken a turn. For better or for worse, I wasn’t sure. But undeniably, it had taken a turn.

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